+3 Months (Believe It!)

Pluvicto means I can walk and breathe again.

Can I have a “cancer vacation”?

After six years of this singular battle, maybe it’s natural that I want at least a temporary reprieve. 

This month, I found myself retreating into myself a bit. I felt tired of the supplements, tired of the diet, the treatments, and often the anxiety of trying to find a radical healing solution in the jungle of opposing suggestions by family, friends and experts. 

I have speculated if this is depression. If so, it would be oddly timed after the fantastic physical resurrection I experienced after my Pluvicto treatment last month. 

My numbers are now down by half. Why would I not be ecstatic?

Here is one of the ways I work with my coaching clients. I have them give a voice to various aspects of their body or consciousness. If cancer had a voice, what would it tell you? If depression had a voice, what would it say? 

What then would your Highest Self say?

Usually, a pretty great conversation.

I suppose my low energy is understandable. Heavy radiation treatments, and contemplating (alas!) moving away from my beloved Idyllwild. 

Yes. The beautiful home I have lived in for over three years, my A-frame in the mountains, is being relinquished so that I may return to Canada for possibly 12 weeks. Then my plan is to move in with my partner, Mark, as we prepare for our upcoming marriage. 

Will the money manifest? Will my volunteer work in Canada be a success? Can I continue my treatments? 

Uncertainty has the great value of potentially motivating you to have more trust in “what is”. This surrender can then generate more energy for action.

Enter the Sacred Yes club. This USM grad club was formed to allow members to complete a nine month project of one’s choosing. Something significant, outside of your comfort zone, allowing unresolved issues to arise, creating more opportunity for growth. 

What I’ve always valued from my teachers is the invitation to just try and do 5% better. Then the next day, maybe another 5%.

So, here I come, bit by bit, out from my malaise. Have patience with this spiritual inchworm!

So, I’m celebrating. I have been slowing down quite a bit, looking around the margins of my life with awe and gratitude. Such love for my friends, family, clients, that person walking the dog across the street - and for YOU.

Joy is just a thought away!